The best word I can use to describe this is longing. There's no question that I left part of me behind in the D.R. I miss it. But at the same time, I don't want to go back. By that I don't mean never going back to the country. What I mean is, I know we've started a new chapter in our lives. And I don't want to go backwards. While I long for the country and people, I don't long to live there or to go "back" to a few years ago. Because that's not where we're supposed to be right now. And I want to go forward. God has done amazing things in this tough transition. Through the pain He's brought us hope. Trough our trials he's grown our faith. And while our future is still uncertain, we're excited about where He's taking us. Yet sometimes I still feel that longing, a longing just to "glimpse" Jarabacoa again. Or to go out to a favorite restaurant or food stand. Or to ride with Daniel on our motorcycle (long ago stolen) through the beautiful mountains.
Instead, I think I'll eat some pastalon (in the oven), drink some ginger tea, and look through some past pictures. And let memories aid in the healing process.